Thursday, June 16, 2011

Faces of Meth: Celebrity Edition

The word "meth" often evokes images of toothless rednecks, burly biker gangs and other unsavory elements of society.  The "Faces of Meth" ad campaign, which showcased the drug's Progeria-like effects in all their scab-encrusted glory, is burned into our nation's collective psyche as a warning against meth abuse.  While the folks featured in the ads were everyday trailer trash like you and me, anyone can fall prey to "the Devil's Drug."  Even celebrities.  Especially celebrities.  And so it is in the spirit of accuracy and equal representation that I present to you--Faces of Meth: Celebrity Edition.  

 Fergie, lead singer of the Black Eyed Peas, has publicly copped to using meth before her rise to international stardom in 2001.  In an interview with People Magazine, she refers to meth as "the hardest boyfriend I ever had to break up with."  The Dutchess beat the addiction using a combination of hypnotherapy and soul-searching.  Let's just hope it didn't phunk with her heart.

Andre Agassi
 As stated in his autobiography, tennis great Andre Agassi used meth for "a year or so" during his reign as tennis champ in the late '90s.  His secret remained concealed even after failing a drug test, which was discarded when he claimed to have "unwittingly" taken the drug.  Sounds like a bald-headed lie to me.

John F. Kennedy
 One of America's most beloved leaders may have been more doped up than the lot of us.  Along with steroid injections for Addison's disease, JFK received daily doses of amphetamines, Demerol, Methadone, Ritalin, Miltown, thyroid hormone and various barbiturates.  And yet he was still more competent than every president who followed him.  All in a day's work for a true American hero. 

Jodie Sweetin
 As the charming middle daughter on Full House, sitcom sweetie Jodie Sweetin shocked the world when she confessed her addiction to meth; which she details in her memoir, UnSweetined.  While she claims to be sober today, Sweetin admits using ecstasy, meth and cocaine during her 2009 sobriety tour.  How rude. 

Amy Winehouse
 Once ranked among R&B greats like Macy Gray and Sarah Vaughan, singer Amy Winehouse spiraled out of control with the quickness after releasing her 2007 album, Back to Black.  While her exact drug arsenal is unknown, it's safe to assume that one or more amphetamines played a role in the downfall of her career.  And her teeth.

Adolf Hitler
From violent aggression to suicidal paranoia, no one embodies the effects of meth better than Adolf Hitler.  Like JFK, the Fuhrer received daily injections of multiple drugs, including Pervitin--a meth pill abused by soldiers on all sides of WWII.  By the end of his evil reign, Hitler exhibited many classic signs of meth abuse, including premature aging and Parkinson-esque hand tremors.  Wie Bezaubern.

Heidi Fleiss
Notorious Hollywood Madam Heidi Fleiss has done her fair share of meth, as seen in exhibit A (her face).  Along with ex-hubby Tom Sizemore, she appeared on Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew after being busted on drug charges in 2008.  Fleiss has since quit speed, divorced Sizemore and lives in Pahrump, NV with her 20+ parrots.  A fairy tale ending fit for a queen.

---Mary Microgram

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Senator Schumer Targets Drug Dealing Website

Lookit, kids!  It's Charles Schumer, the dude who waged a widely publicized war on "Bath Salts" a few months ago.  The senator is now setting his sights on Silk Road, an eBay-like website dealing in illicit drugs. 


"Silk Road, a digital black market that sits just below most internet users’ purview, does resemble something from a cyberpunk novel. Through a combination of anonymity technology and a sophisticated user-feedback system, Silk Road makes buying and selling illegal drugs as easy as buying used electronics — and seemingly as safe. It’s Amazon — if Amazon sold mind-altering chemicals."

To all of my well-informed readers, I ask this question:  How many of you had ever heard of this website before Schumer's rant?  Despite Mary's heavy involvement in the online drug discussion community, Silk Road is news to her.  Just like bath salts, Silk Road has gained mainstream attention via stories like this...and just like bath salts, online drug dealing will thrive in spite of (because of?) politician tantruming.  The question is, on what scale?  I'd like to personally thank Senator Schumer for helping ensure the growth of the online drug trade, which eliminates at least some of the dangers of street-corner deals.

You can thank him here.

Source: Underground Website Lets You Buy Any Drug Imaginable

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Rare Drug Profile: Ethchlorvynol (Placidyl)

Scientific Name:  Ethchlorvynol

Effects:  Depressant (sedation, intoxication, slowed breathing).

Description:  Ethchlorvynol, better known by the brand name Placidyl, is a now-obsolete depressant drug with barbiturate-like effects.  Chief Justice William Rehnquist was addicted to the drug for nine years before his death.  Placidyl was discontinued in 1999 due to its high risk for side effects and abuse.

Method of Ingestion:  Oral.  Available in 100, 200, 500 and 750 mg. doses.

Safety Precautions:  May cause respiratory depression, unconsciousness, coma, cardiac arrest, addiction or death. 

Sample Trip Report:  "On several occasions after taking Placidyl 750's I remember the following day drifting into the wildest vivid dreams and saying some off the wall shit that would have people around me in tears! I guess I'd slip into REM for just a few seconds, but a few seconds of REM seems like an hour! I turned a girlfriend onto one and remember her screaming "pass the fucking butter!!" while she was passed out. I woke her up and she thought she was at the dinner table eating corn-on-the-cob!!! I guess I probably went through withdrawals at times, but I didn't realize it because those words weren't spoken in those days." (Bluelight)

Source: Ethchlorvynol Vault

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Dope Jams: Cocaine

"Cocaine" by Eric Clapton.  From his 1977 album, Slowhand.

Florida Law Requires Drug Testing for Welfare Recipients

Florida sets a dangerous precedent with its new law requiring welfare recipients to undergo drug testing to receive assistance.   


"The measure makes Florida the only state to test all recipients of the federal program known as Temporary Assistance to Needy Families, according a Washington-based public policy group that says other states have chosen less obtrusive ways to monitor drug use.

The new law, a version of which was struck down by a federal court in Michigan in 2003, requires recipients to pay for the tests before qualifying for benefits and periodically after they receive them.

The law was one of Scott's campaign promises. Supporters say it will help ensure that taxpayer money is used to get families on their feet and not to fuel drug habits at state expense.

"While there are certainly legitimate needs for public assistance, it is unfair for Florida taxpayers to subsidize drug addiction," Scott said in a statement released after he signed the bill during a visit to Panama City.

"This new law will encourage personal accountability and will help to prevent the misuse of tax dollars."

Beginning July 1, recipients who test positive for drugs would be denied benefits for a year. A second failed test would result in a three-year ban.

In two-parent households, both adults would be tested. Benefits to children could be awarded to a third-party recipient, who must also pass a drug screen.

The law will not affect the federal food stamp program.

Critics, including the American Civil Liberties Union of Florida and Florida Legal Services, said they will decide in coming weeks if they plan to file suit against the law on the grounds that blanket drug tests are unconstitutional.

Federal law allows states to screen for drug use under the TANF program, which provides a maximum $300 a month cash assistance to needy families. The program, which replaced traditional welfare in the mid 1990s, has a 48-month lifetime cap on benefits.

Other states have studied the issue and decided testing all recipients was not cost effective, the Washington-based Center for Legal and Social Policy said in a study released in January.
Most states have drug assessment programs that do not include urine or blood tests. Some require drug tests from recipients who have been convicted of felony drug crimes.

During debate about the law, critics pointed to a pilot testing program in Florida that was shut down in 2001 after it showed no significant difference in drug use between welfare recipients and the population at large.

"The wasteful program created by this law subjects Floridians who are impacted by the economic downturn, as well as their families, to a humiliating search of their urine and body fluids without cause or even suspicion of drug abuse," said Howard Simon, executive director of ACLU Florida, in a statement."

While Mary does not support the use of welfare money to purchase illicit substances (who DOES?), she detests the invasion of privacy even more.  Drug use does not necessarily indicate a). addiction or b). use of taxpayer money to purchase drugs.  (Consider that marijuana stays in your system for up to a month after use, in which case sharing a joint with a friend could result in an empty cupboard for your kids weeks later.)  One frequently overlooked detail: the new law does nothing to prevent alcoholics and smokers from receiving welfare despite their collective cost to society, which is greater than that of all illicit drug users combined. 

America already requires drug testing for jobs and organ transplants.  What's next?  At this rate, we could be facing drug tests just to receive medical care, public education or worse.  I urge you not to sit idly by and wait for that day to arrive.  It may not be as far off as you think.  


Reuters: Florida To Test All Welfare Recipients for Drugs

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Stoner Events Guide--June 2011

June 2-5:  Wakarusa Music and Camping Festival--Ozark, AR

June 5:  World Environment Day

June 9-12:  Bonnaroo--Manchester, TN

June 16-19:  Telluride Bluegrass Festival--Telluride, CO

June 21:  First Day of Summer

June 24-25:  Electric Daisy Carnival--Las Vegas, NV

June 25-26:  Gay Pride Festival--San Francisco, CA

June 29-July 3:  Summerfest--Milwaukee, WI 

Should I Try MDMA?


My bf got ahold of two molly capsules last weekend and wants me to take it with him.  I've read everything i can find about ecstasy and think I'm ready to take the plunge! :)  I'm a little nervous but still think it will be fun.  Any last minute advice, i.e. fun things to do?  Reasons I shouldn't do it? (no health problems that I kno of) THANKS MARY!



Thanks for your question, Anonymous.  I commend you for doing your research and giving it careful consideration beforehand.  Way to not die.

It sounds like you're not 100% sure you want to try MDMA, in which case it would be better to wait.  Before trying a new drug, Mary advises people to ask themselves a few basic questions:

1.  What is the end goal of using the drug?  (What do I want to take away from the experience?)
2.  Are there any other ways to achieve the goal that don't involve drug use?
3.  Am I prepared to handle a really bad trip?
4.  Am I prepared to handle a really good trip?  (Overwhelmingly positive experiences can make everyday life seem dull by comparison, leading to abuse and dependence.)

If you decide to use MDMA, it's important to take the proper precautions. Start with a low dose, choose a comfortable, safe environment and do not combine MDMA with other drugs (including alcohol).      

As for activities, many people enjoy sensory experiences like listening to upbeat music, eating Pop Rocks or receiving massages.  Dancing is fun too, but make sure to drink plenty of water or an electrolyte-rich sports drink to prevent dehydration.  Some users like to take MDMA at parties or other large gatherings; others prefer more intimate settings.  The activities you will enjoy depend largely on your reasons for using MDMA in the first place (see Question 1 above).

In the end, you have to make the final call on whether MDMA is worth trying.  Even if your boyfriend loves the drug, there is no guarantee that you will, too.  And remember, you're not infringing on his rights by abstaining, but he would be infringing on yours by pressuring you to do something you're not ready for.  Just a thought.

*Sidenote:  If you're under 18, I strongly suggest waiting until you're older to try MDMA, as not much is known about its effects on the developing brain.  Like any drug, MDMA can be habit-forming and becomes less safe the more it's used.  Why not wait until later in life to take those risks?  After all, the drug known as "ecstasy" is not going away any time soon.

Your Majestic Maven of Molly Magic,

Mary Microgram