I am on subutex at the moment. It does a DECENT job of my depression. Just decent. I got on them because of a poppy tea habit of a few years.
I have to to say that in those two years, two years filled with confidence, a great sense of well being, no dark clouds, confidence, I made some of my lifes BEST decisions. I started a business that I NEVER EVER WOULD HAVE STARTED without me being of poppy tea. NEVER. ………EVER. But, cause I saw life as a POSITIVE, I went for it, and now, for the first time in my life, I make more than I need….MUCH more. My marriage also got better during this time, at least the part where my wife would constantly complain about me being depressed, down, negative, not a “fun” person.
But, for some reason, I wanted to quit. Can’t really remember why. I know getting the poppies was a pain. Seeds all over the place. Not being able to travel…..I do know one negative was that I got sleepy driving and got into an accident. THAT in itself was the biggest thing for quitting.
Now, Im blue, a downer, a dark cloud following me. Somedays, I just sit there and actually talk to myself. “I have NO REASON to be depressed. None. My marriage is sort of saved, I THROW MONEY away…….Im healthy. My family is healthy…..WHY AM I SO DEPRESSED??
I am really thinking about getting back on tea. And having the subutex for travel, etc.
PS. Other buzzes, drinking, coke, etc…does NOTHING for me. I can take em or leave em. A tea buzz is different. Its almost NOT a buzz at all..,…..to me. I don’t like the “nods”, so my buzzes tend to be on the mild side, i guess.
Mary understands your predicament very well, Nck. A little too well in a lot of ways, but that’s neither here nor there.
The bottom line is this: Without a degree in psychology and personal knowledge of your situation, I'm in no position to suggest one treatment over another. What I can do is help you weigh the pros and cons of poppy tea vs. the path you’re currently on to give you a clearer idea of what you want to do.
Because of the serious nature of depression, treatment should be sustainable in terms of cost, effectiveness, and accessibility. The first factor—cost—depends heavily on your dose and frequency of use. Has your pod habit ever become unaffordable due to ever-increasing doses? If so, you’ll likely find poppy tea an increasingly ineffective and costly habit--one that cannot continue on an upward trajectory forever.
Secondly, consider your sources for poppy tea. How reliable are they? The “gray area” legal status of pods makes them subject to random targeting by the law enforcement, which could restrict future access in the event of a crackdown. Price is subject to the whims of vendors and growers, while unforeseeable events like lack of internet access could impede your ability to obtain your medicine. What steps could you take to ensure steady access to poppies? And what are your backup options if access becomes restricted in spite of your efforts?
Finally, how manageable was your poppy tea use in the past? (It counts to be honest with yourself here). Opiates are a highly addictive class of drugs—the more you use, the less effective they become until eventually they don’t work for your depression at all and you're taking them just to prevent sickness. If you’re serious about using tea to help manage depression, Mary suggests taking a measured dose of tea at the same time each day and not using at any other time for any other reason. You wouldn’t double drop Prozac to deal with a hard day; the same should go for pods...right?
In terms of long-term health risks, poppy tea is no more dangerous than other opiates and may be even less harmful due to its unique mix of naturally occurring alkaloids that act as a safety net against overdose (to a degree). Standard depression and anxiety meds like SSRIs can also cause side effects and long-term health issues, making them unsuitable for many patients. The biggest risks of poppy use are tolerance and addiction, which can make depression symptoms 100x worse. As long as you bear this in mind and remain honest with yourself about your patterns of use, poppy tea can remain a viable option in your arsenal against depression.
Your Precocious Pal in Poppy Prose,